I am the legend. The past, the present, the future. The king you will bow to, as you march in a stupor. I sit atop the thrown alone. The single minded ruler. There is no woman worth to quench my thirst, although I have millions of suiters. Woman fall upon my feet, because I AM the ruler of rulers. This king is single minded, I see no queen within my future. God hasn't created a woman that my legend won't make look like a loser. The gods are jealous of me, so they send to me Medusa's, cloaked with beautiful faces, hair of snakes hissing, so ruthless. I sever the head's of such beasts, and feed them to cerberus. My legendary three headed dog, i'm merciless. It's clear I adhere to no law upon this land. I sink my fingers into the soil, and your castle will not stand. Your majestic kingdom crumbles with the contraction of my hand. A fist made out of iron, I can crush the bone of man. But they are still gentle enough to catch a single grain of sand. I stand as tall as mountains, casing shadows over land. I am the legendary, In my shadow you shall stand. There you will always be, no sun light for you to see. I will never fall by the hands of lames, and that you are to me. My crown cocked to the side. My pen is the futures link. I'll write you out of existence with my legendary ink. I've slaughtered millions of armies, with the lines that I do write. With this pen I do find that I hold the greatest might. No muscle can compare to the lines that I do write. When I address the masses, Royal dialog I do recite. My oratory awesomely brings the blind site. I am the legend. The past. The present. The future. The king you will bow to as you march within a stupor. I sit atop the thrown alone. The single minded ruler. No room for love. Love is a cancer that I seek to keep in remission. And It will never keep me from the LEGENDARY.
Monday, December 28, 2009
Wednesday, December 23, 2009
2 luv birds
two love birds, who fly with wings divine. soar the skys with a love that transended time. She love's me, and I love her. Nothing in this world can ever compare to what we were. We were in love, soaring the sky, Our wings streached apart, gliding high in the sky. She cliped my wing, and I couldnt fly. I struggled to fly, falling fast out of the sky. I landed so hard, But I didn't die. The love birds were grounded, love wouldn't let them fly. She tried to mend my wing, but couldn't see the pain in my eye's. She tried to cheer up my cries, but couldn't answer my why's. My wing never really healed, again the love birds would fly. I struggled in the air and pulled her out of the sky. Now the 2 love bird, with wings divine, wounded each other, so in the sky they could not fly. She walked away, and so did I. We have been grounded ever since, this always makes me cry. I love her. so I couldn't try to keep us together until I fully healed my wings divine. So I let her fly, with someone else. I had to heal this broken wing and save myself. It hurt me so, But I love too much to ever hurt her again. I prayed to god that one day we would take flight again. Two love birds, With wings divine. She would always return to me from time to time. I am always on her mind. We find our way back to each other, that is gods sign. You have returned again. Hopefully for the last time. I won't let you leave me again. please, not this time. my wing is fully healed, and yours healed like mine. please fly with me again. this time is the last time. let's reclaim the sky, soar high with our wings divine. We always find our way back to each other. Let's make this time, the last time.
Friday, December 18, 2009
script tattoo lounge presents "unscripted vol.1"
Wednesday, December 16, 2009
stressed out (so write about that dummy)
I could write about love, I could write about sex, I could write about emotional attachment or success. I could write about anything and you would all be impressed, But I can't write anything because right now i'm stressed. Man things are hard pressed because i'm moving like a boss. In the mist of all of these power moves my pen has become lost. instead of writing poetry, i'm writing proposals and signing checks, on my road to becoming the man the world will come to respect. My pen I will never neglect, but writing you gonna have to wait. I'm taking us to the next level, this is the chance I have to take. Understand i'm strong enough to withstand it all, so I won't buckle under the weight. So i'm sorry but writing you gonna have to wait. I'm making power moves, moving like a boss, which is great. I'm building my empire in this state. But i'm getting a little stressed, i'm like "time out " "wait" I need to take a breather, I need a short break. My hairs growing into a short fro, I'm in need of a caezar. But thats the price you pay when it's ceazar that you play, and you realize that your life is not for play, you must stay, while other get to play, you must fight with all your might and work hard from top of the day until bottom of the night. you must scrifice your life. No girlfriend, No wife, not even a jump-off. Forget about a social life. I'm pushing myself to limits normal people can't handle. Wouldn't even think to, Couldn't stand to. try to function off of 2 hours of sleep for a week, see if you can see strait, see if your legs won't be weak. coffee, coffee, coffee. Caffein i've been drinking in my sleep. Whats the point of drinking it now, the coffee grounds I should eat. This is stress at it's apex. Man I feel like i'm gonna die. How much more can I take? How much longer can I go with out sleep? I don't know and I don't care because I'm close to what I want. I'm close to what I want. I"M CLOSE TO WHAT I WANT. Even though I feel like i'm dying, I never been this happy. I'm close to what I want. But right now i'm stressed. I can't wait to go on vacation. lord knows I need one.
Saturday, December 12, 2009
goddess of the word.
I'm writing directly to you. Holder of the same dream as I. Goddess of the word. I'm writing directly to you. Key to the emotions I hide, unlock my soul. I write with the words only you understand. Other will read this and think is is to them. But you are the holder of the same dream as I. The key to the emotions I wish I didn't have to hide. Goddess of the word. I offer you my pen, please write our story if in your life you want me in. place me in your story with the ink from my soul. write us into existence with your words so bold. My pen is all I have, But I give it to you. We share the same dream so what is it you want to do? we can live out our dreams together, and write about it. Our stories are so beautiful, worlds pause, stop to read about us and are captivated by it. My paragraph complements yours. When you write a verse, What I write will be the continuation of yours. Goddess of the word. Two scribes that will inscribe their lives in the sky. The world will subscribe to the story of you and I. Key to the emotions I hide. Goddess of the word. Holder of the same dream as I. I give you my pen. Let's collaborate and write the the greatest story ever. YOU and I.
Tuesday, December 8, 2009
The eyes do not see.
The eyes do not see what the mind does not acknowlegde. I acknowlegde That you want attention. I won't give it to you. I am too enthralled in intellect to acknowlegde th plight of fools. Since I have already won, I will let The losers lose. I do not see your desperate crys for attention from me, I'm too busy to see what you want me to see. Now you try to place things in plan site, But my site is tunneled, Eyes forward with the vision. My vision obstructed, And it stays that way, go play that way. These eyes do not see what my mind will not acknowledge. I giggle at your feeble misguided attempts to rise my eyebrow, or even Warrant a smile. As you bang on pots and pans and scream out loud, what a child. I'm too grown to be thrown from solitudes majestic thrown. Why would a king pay attention to the stupidity of a clown? So these eyes despise any desperate dummy who tries to hold signs on the side of the freeway while i'm speeding by. my eyes do not see what my mind won't acknowledge. I won't acknowledge yours or anyones stupidity. I'm tunnel with the vision I was given, exclusivity.
content?
So now you think you've done something? You think you have accomplished much. Now you walk around with your chest poked out. Now you relax like you've made it. Look at you, your content. Wipe that look of satifaction off your face. Your swimming in a pond, when you should be jet skiing in the ocean. Your just a guest on this yacht, when you should want to be the owner. Content? NO my friend, we don't do content. We don't do complacent which is adjacent to mediocrity. No not us, More is what we strive for. We squeeze blood out of rocks because we can. We can do more because we have been given more. So it would be a sin if complacency was the mentality we would befriend. This is the day that the real work begins. This is the day that you find out if you want it. DO YOU WANT IT? IF so then content is something you should never be. Diligence is the approach that you should take. Realize it's not what you have done, but rather what your doing. Greatness precedes the past, All the the victories that you have accomplished must be dworthed by the size of the task's at hand. Content is not a word that has built a great man. Our pursuit for more shall be relentless. Restless he is. Content he is not, so I will sleep when i'm dead. normalcy scares me, so i'm active in bed. I toss and turn because I dream of what must be done, What more can I do. Not what I did, But rather What haven't I done. If you are content within your life, Then I am happy for you. I expect more from myself, so there is much I must do. I am not content.
Monday, December 7, 2009
the unhealthy obsession with me
winning streak
I've been on a winning streak, after taking a lose. Now I can't lose, Man I floss like a boss. Grabbed victory out of defeat, I up'ed and shook it off. Told myself i'm gonna win the championship at any cost. Guess I took that game too lightly, I didn't think I'd see a lose. Funny thing is I was scoring crazy, I was balling with the force. stutter step, hitting three's, defend me you getting sauced. I was on my A game until she came and I got crossed. She had a little more game, had me looking like a lame, Had me sitting on the bench with a towel over my head in shame. She dropped 50 on my ass, I didn't even score a point. She was fowling me crazy, and the referee didn't see my point. She threw a elbow to my chest, she didn't even get a tech. I got beat in front of everyone, damn I lost my respect. But like a true baller, I just took it back to the basic's. My coach and my teammates didn't even have to say shit. Everyday in the gym, jumper after jumper. If you think i'm about to shoot, then i'm pump faking on ya. spin move, to the rim, please don't jump when i'm in the air. I'm gonna put you in a poster, let you know that life's not fair. My first game back, I made sure I was prepared. The defender looked my in the eye's, I could see that he was scared. I made sure to let the world know I'm about to take it there. They passed me the ball and I dribbled it with no fear. Hit him with the in and out move and crossed his ankle in the air.They're talking about me on sports center like "look i'm just saying, after that lose he took, this kid is not playing". So yes I took a lose. But it only made me hungry. It only made me want it more. Now nobody and hold me. I wish a nigga would, because I'm just that good. Sure I might lose again, But that lose will keep me focused. I don't want to win too much, too much victory will make you hopeless. Because even when I lose, I do not lose the lesson. The lose that I took, believe me it was a blessing. Because of it i'm on a winning streak, winning from a lose, so hold this. I took a L but thats alright, because of it i'm focused......CHAMPIONSHIP!!!!!
Thursday, December 3, 2009
Hold them back
Hold them back. Be stronger then you've ever been before. please don't let them win, your better then this. fight harder then you've ever had to fight in you life. fight though all the pain. fight through all the strife. hold them back with everything you have. hold them back with all your might. Don't give them the satifaction of thinking that they've won.They want to see you defeated, but the battles just begun. The dam is starting to crack, I feel I can no longer hold this. I want to let this river flow, I can no longer control this. the pain has staggered me, it's too intense for me to focus. This heart has been devoured like a field of starving locust. I don't deserve this hurt, i won't allow myself to go through this. I'm fighting harder now, but I see resistance is useless. I'm starting to circum, it's evident my struggles foolish. Their streaming down my face, leaving a trail thats rather goulish. I tried to be strong, but I can't. Once again I must go through this, I'm crying.......Damn.
Wednesday, December 2, 2009
HMIC (head mommy's in charge)
I'm in awe of ya'll. I love the vision in my head you guys have been creating. To find such a solid foundation, I am patiently waiting. I write this after our conversation, the things that we were debating. Respect to the HMIC (Head Mommy's In Charge), who rise the young to do great things. She risked her life and sacrificed her body, to bring a precious addition to we. First there was you, then she came along, now baby makes three. If she provided you with more then one, thats more of the lords blessing you see. Respect the HMIC, she A blessing to thee. Nine months she carried a seed, and in some cases even more. Realize all of the pain that she has to endure. Life is not promised, she could of died delivering such a gift. At 3am, when she sent you to the store for a peanut butter and pickle sandwich, did you moan and bitch? When her ankles got swollen, did you rub them? Everyday of your life your life you should tell the HMIC that you love um, place nothing above them, spoil, kiss and hug them. If your not on good terms with them, thats no reason to mean mug them. You guys are joined at the hip for the rest of your life. She still the mother of your children, even if she's not your wife. She made a sacrifice for you, don't neglect her, if you pay child support, throw her a little extra. Rising a child will always be a full time job. All of the diapers changed, all of the baby slob. All the bottles that she heated up at 4 in the morning. The countless hours nursing, while she's dead tired and yarning. I'm not saying us guys do anything, it's that she just does more.You had fun creating your baby, now have fun raising it. Respect the HMIC's that hold it down on the home front. the ones that make sure your babies go to school with a full lunch. the ones that find joy in spending time with your little Diago or Dora the explorer. She helping to cultivate the minds of your son or your daughter. She loves nothing more then to brag about the love she has for her beautiful children. Respect to the HMIC's (Head mommy's in charge) and the foundations they are building.
I would like to thank Karen Colon And Yvette castonon for the motivation. Two great HMIC's who have some lucky children.
Tuesday, December 1, 2009
function/dysfunction
I seem to function around dysfunction . I've been exposed to it all my life and now I've arrived at this junction, point period in time.The things I've seen as a child, I block out of my mind. The things that hunt me today, I pay them no mind. I've done all I could to change things, but this dysfunction is not mine.It would make no sense to sacrifice my life and valuable time. I grew up in dysfunction, But I fought for a life of normalcy. In my mind I fought battles like the soldiers that stormed the beach of Normandy. The things I saw I preyed to god that they were lies and weren't true. I was never told those things were wrong, But some how I knew those were things I shouldn't do. As a child, people judged me on their actions. I guess they thought I was just like you. And truthfully if I was them, I would think so too. It wasn't just his dysfunction, All of you played a part too. I know the truth, Thats why to this day I don't want to talk to you. I had issues that reached deep from the dysfunction I was exposed to, But I fought for a life of normalcy, because thats what I chose to do. I could sit here and blame my failures on the people that created me, Because I wasn't given a chance to win, but this is what made me. I'm not a victim of the dysfunction that I functioned around. I'm not a victim of the dysfunction that hunts me now. It depressed me to the point that I started to break. I wondered if I would crack, how much more could I take? then I realized i'm no savior and I can not change a thing. If this is how they want to live, then I will let them do their thing. If this situation is acceptable to them, then it's acceptable to I. Theres not point to try, there's no reason to cry. I function around dysfunction because I have no choice but to. I am as great as I can be, despite the horror I was exposed to. I hope within your life, you won't let dysfunction erode you. Be strong.
Sunday, November 29, 2009
this time last year
this time last year, I bought a ring to place on your finger. As I would bow on one knee to tell you that I love you. I was going to engage you in my love, capture your spirit, mind, body, heart soul in one. I never got to do that because I did something dumb. Because of that I lost something near and dear to my heart. I lost control of my life because of issues I couldn't handle. the pressure of my family and an old relationship that I didnt care about, pushed me to the brink of utter destruction. Because of that I destroyed what was heaven sent for me. This time last year I hated women. ALL women. Any women next to me was going to feel my wrath. Every relationship I ever had was so bad. It created a beast that I couldn't control. picture a man lifeless, walking around with no soul, no hold, no control at all. Objectified all women because of what some did.This time last year, I hurt a really good woman, because I let these good for nothing "bitches" get the best of me. They ripped me apart and left me for dead, lifeless in the street. A man I didn't recognize took it out on you. This time last year I fell so hard and couldn't get back up. I was hurt so bad and couldn't recover from it. I saw their faces when I looked at you. I saw their lies, cheating ways, when I looked in your eyes. My pain controlled me, took hold of me, reached deep inside of me and wouldn't let go. I tried to be a good man but I wasn't the same. I take full responsibility though, those hoes are not to blame. I fought to be Eugene woody again. I fought to be the man I am. I freed myself of the pain that gripped me. I freed myself from the hell I endured. And I'm never going back to what I was last year. No woman will ever have that power over me. Never again. No matter what they do. Just now I was tested, and played for a fool. I should be broken like last year, nope not this dude. This time last year prepared me for this time again. And this time i'll get it right. This time I'm focused On a life that is heaven sent from the lord above. This time this year I didn't break. Hell I didn't even flinch. Yeah they tried to inflict pain but I didn't feel a pinch. This time this year, I'm the man you should of had. The man holding that ring trying to be your children's dad. Your husband, best friend, companion, greatest man you ever had. I'm happy that your happy, thats why I don't feel bad. A new year approaches, and my future has never look this bright. I wonder what i'll write about this time next year? I look forward to it.
Friday, November 27, 2009
bridges burned
Look at the bridges you burned. And i'm not talking about todd with a venereal. we watch you from our aerial, Standing at the bridges base.pouring gasoline everywhere with a sinister look on your face.You struck the match, then flung it, and arson was the case. As I stood on the other side, amazed at your misdeeds. Everyone rallied around me and witnessed you evil steez. They all tried to warn me, they said this is not hard to believe. They consoled me, said "you tried, now it's time to leave". As we walked away from the burning bridge, My friends phone rang. they answered it, and we just laughed at the person on the other end like "OH PLEASE!" Apparently the arsonist was looking for another sucker to mislead. What are you thinking? like you could fool one of us, and the others wouldn't see the Forrest from the trees? This you can believe, WE all ride together, no matter the inclement weather. You can't cross that bridge anymore, That life line has been severed. You see, doing people wrong has a domino affect. Thats just common sense though, theres a cause and affect. So stand upon that bridge you burned and wipe the ashes from your face. Now realize what you have is what your stuck with, Because WE are not looking back. So keep burning bridges, and i'm not talking about Todd with a venereal. While we reminisce and laugh about this arsonist, from our aerial. higher then.
Wednesday, November 25, 2009
scraches on my back
the moment is getting deeper, deeper, deeper. I feel you closer then my skin, now that I have you here. I got you pinned underneath me, i'm on top, top. I'm pearing in your eye's, your hearts beating like its about to pop. you want to talk, but for some reason I won't let you. I bite your bottom lip and whisper softly "shut up". I'm dominating the situation, situation, situation. I've been patently waiting to hear you scream my name. Your legs are wrapped around my waist to the small of my back. The deeper I go the more you react. Our bodies catch the same rhythm, if I speed up then so do you. The more you moan the tighter that i'm holding you. And you hold me tighter too, you start to shutter in fact. Your virtue gets tighter, I can feel you climax. But just before you do your nails dig in. and after that, you reach your moment of bliss, and leave scraches on my back. Deep and painful wounds from this event. Afterwards i'm immense pain because your joy was intense. I wouldnt have it any other way, without them I'm through because I find my pleasure in pleasing you. I watch you sleep in that bed with a smile on your face. My arrogance is running over, all i do is smerk. I hop in the shower and reflect upon things. I turn around, the water hit's my back, I grimace in pain............OUCH.
Tuesday, November 24, 2009
finally be (this is it)
His dreams are his reality because he makes them so. in the beginning he was alone with just his dream in tow. headphones draped his ears as the rhythms motivated thought. He would feed his mind and soul with all the book he did sport. from Sun Tzu to Machiavelli, then Robert green added. He read until his brain felt bruised and battered. The information he received helped him cultivate a vision, He would work day and night to bring it to fruition. All the doubt was removed and the fear since subsided, everything that he was crippled by, with his pen he would write it. Then expose it to the world so he was forced to change. Any obstacle in his way, he would destroy or maim. He would seek those in the world with a similar vision. He was moved by the way they used there pen, so he asked them to join his rhythm. It started with just two, with our words we enlightened, people complemented the style in the way we would write them. Now the third pen is here to put us over the top. this is all part of my vision that can not be stopped. I won't sit and cheer because there is much to be done. The hard work will rear it's head in the months to come. But i'm elated because this vision was much belated. Hard work and success they are so equated. This is real because it's the happiest I ever been. Yeah I love, but I'm the soul mate of my pen. When I'm on stage I get the greatest feeling there has ever been. This book wrote it self, I just used the pen. the play i'm writing got me all excited. Greatness is one the way, so I won't even fight it. I been kicked all my life, now I fly so high that the legs of negativity can't reach the sky. this is it, God gave me a reason to live for me. My dream of dying a poet will finally be.
Sunday, November 22, 2009
delila, my delila
delila, my delila! my downfall you are not. just look at this situation. I'm on the verge of fulfilling my destiny of greatness, and your on the verge of destruction. truth be told I knew all alone, but I felt sorry for you, so I tried to help the helpless. Delila, my delila. This samson will not fall. I stand as tall as the day you met me. I continue to do so. I have much to be thankful for. so assassinate your character i will not. Maybe your unhappy with the person that you are. Maybe your just bitter and you took it out on me. Maybe you've been used by men and wanted to do the same. But maybe I don't care to know anymore because i'm not the one to blame. understand life is great, when you accept you have to change. you have a long way to go in life, and from where I stand I don't think you will make it. But I hope that you do. I prey that you will. I hate no one because I love myself. thats why I won't fall. My dreams I fought tooth and nail for, and now they are finally here. I don't feel bad because I did everything in my power to help you. to make you happy. To love you. But delila, my delila you have issues that cant be helped by anyone but yourself. I learned from this and I grow. Bigger and better I am, trust me, This didn't break me. I AM NOT SAMSON. I hope you learn something, other than what you used against me. like realize when people really care about you and want to see you win. not those that just want you for the pleasures of your skin. delila, my delila. god put us together for a reason, then he ripped us apart because you changed like the seasons. trust me i'm not bitter because you know i'm living my dream. what you live is a nightmare or so it would seem. I won't let anyone be my downfall. this samson and delila story does not apply at all. thank you for everything, I mean this from the bottom of my heart. by taking everything you have given me so much.
Friday, November 20, 2009
the ironic sign
It's ironic that our embrace was broken by my inner most desire being revealed. My inner most desire was to be with you. I wanted nothing more then that. An embrace I though would last was broken by what should have solidified. It was written on a bill board, How ironic is that? How was I to know this sign was talking to me? My future was posted on a bill board for the world to see. I saw it and didn't realize it pertained to me. If there ever was such a sign....literally. It speaks directly to me. It tried to tell me what was coming. I couldn't understand it, maybe I didn't want to. My inner most desire broke our embrace. This bill board told me before I told you. God is funny style. Look how he spoke to me. Look how he showed me. How could I understand this at the time? We pray all the time and ask God for A sign. It's right in plain sight, just look closer. He's talking to you directly. When I finally realized this it was done. Now all I can do is laugh. But I laugh because I also see the other Ironic sign. EXPOSE YOUR INNER VISION. If there was ever any doubt in my mind, It has be removed. I am doing just that. I am following his plan. I AM GONNA DIE A POET. It was written in this ironic sign.
lose/gain
Why does this lost feel like a gain? Why does it feel like I amassed more in the end the from from which I came? If the origin represented the negative, and the ending just the opposite, then the ending holds the attribute's of monetary profits. I'm no profit, But with foresight Guess I sensed impending doom. So with that I just prepared for the inevitable gloom. Is it because I been here before? Is it because I except the things I can not change? Or is it because I understand I'm in a privileged position to win? I see a finish line and I just shed extra weight so now I'm sprinting. What did I really lose? What did I really gain? I guess only time can answer that. I know what was lost, or rather what lost me. I smile because I'm gaining on my dream. I can see it with such clarity even though it's still in the distance. But I see it more then ever before. So I can smile for that reason alone. I can focus on that instead of what I lost, or rather what lost me.
Wednesday, November 18, 2009
the inglorious oratory of eugene woody
Sunday, November 15, 2009
God, Children and Fools.
I was told god takes care of children and fools. It's kind of ironic because I was fooled by a child. I hoped for the best, And the worst was found. Every one saw the truth but I. I was a fool. I won't lie. But heres the thing about me, I'm aware of everything that transpires. But I hope people will change, So I show them my heart with the hope that will be the reason they will. I'm not ashamed of this fact.I wont hide from this ordeal. I confront it because you made it easy to do so. I'm fine with things now because I was a fool, I say fool in past tense because God took care of his son in need. I'm sure you will be fine, Remember he takes care of children, and their is nothing grown about you, So you will be kept in his favor, Just not in mine. What a story! God put a fool and a child together in hopes that they would find their way. The child found the weakness of the fool and exploited it. The child could not grow up to see things for what they were, so now you are a foolish child. He will always watch over you now because you are both. I have been trough worse then this. I have been fooled only once, So I can grown from this, Learn and move on. You don't understand the lesson in anything because you are just a hard headed child, I pity your ignorance. I hope you learn. I know you will learn the hard way. I pray that he continues to watch over you, you foolish child. Realize a blessing when he gives it to you. I was blessed with strength, thats why I took the punishment, knowing all well he had a plain for me. I've been blessed because this fool found his way again. I prey you wake up you foolish child. thanks for the motivation.
Friday, November 13, 2009
wings of light
I'm void of a feeling called despair. She has given me reason's to walk on air. I inhabit the clouds and the stars with might. I fly with my wings made of light at night. It would seem that these bright angel wings are a dream, When she kisses me good night I ascend with out a care of things. When she roll's over to hold me tight, The wings she has given made of light stretch miles across the skyline, behold such a site. she whispers in my ear "I missed you my dear" and I patrol the sky without any fear. Her heart beat becomes one with mine, and I sit upon the stars and watch the world just to pass the time. Her legs become entangled with mine, So I write her name in the sky with the light of these wings divine. With every caress of my chest across the sky I step, For these wings she has given I am so in debt. My wing's flap a melody, the rhythm is set. I grab the hand of the moon and engage in a two-step. You may see me in the sky flying as high as I can. Thats only because I'm sleeping next to Gods greatest creation. If I do not feel her touch, the wings of light disappear, darkness holds court, Now i'm falling to the ground in fear. I search frantically for her physical to connect to my mental. The Wings reappear because I emotionally sense you. Before I hit the ground, your gift sends me sky bound, as I return to the air where my freedom is found. She's the reason this vision inhabits my dreams, Shes the angel and when I sleep I borrow her wings. My nightmares disappear because I know you are near. I awake and you are gone............God needed his angel. I'll see you when I dream. photograph by ~Will Knox~ Thanks for the motivation Will (great picture man)
Thursday, November 12, 2009
what's important?
what's important to you? Baby I just gotta know, because what's important to me is you. Again, what's important to you? Is it me or is it him? because I'm the better future then the current state your in. I state the facts and state my feeling and I state them from within. I make this statement, stay with him and you would be committing sin. I was heaven sent to mend your broken heart, I'll be your friend. I should be important to you, I'll repeat this once again. What's Important to you? Baby I just gotta know because what's important to me is you. Again, What's important to you? Is it me or is it money? are you checking for my love? or a monetary dummy? I can take care of you, But this has to be for real. Love is sacred so don't treat it like a corporate business deal. A real woman get it herself and let's me add to her joy. A man can buy you the world, but only love can fill that void. so what's important to you? baby I just gotta know, because what's important to me is you. again what's important to you? is it WE or is it YOU? are we in this life together? or are you in this life for you? I will be the support system in whatever you want to do. You can be a little selfish, just think about me too. If you buy yourself some diamonds, pick me up a pair of socks. The hanes cotton one's, baby it's the though that really rocks. I want to be important to you, you should make me a priority. I'm more then a minority, baby i'm the majority. The prince in the fairy tale, the leading man in the story. I should be important to you, make me so, baby girl do not ignore me.
Tuesday, November 10, 2009
punishment/penance
this is my punishment,this is my penance. My sins were to great to overcome in one life time. I keep coming back because I haven't suffered enough. My god is a cruel god, he must hate me so. He gave me such emotions. The strongest being the ability to love, and he breaks my heart over and over and over again. It's in his plain that I suffer like this. His will be done that I slowly decay from a broken heart. You must hate me so. I love so hard and fall even harder. when have you given me the emotion I long for? Never. Not even from the mother that birthed me.You hate me so, but I submit to your punishment, this is my penance. Because my sins are too great to overcome in one life time. I have no choice but to suffer your will. I see what you want from me, I understand the lesson . I am to be alone because I am not lovable. I am not acceptable. I am broken, But your will be done. My own personal hell on earth. I'm alive but I'm not living. I give, never to receive. to love, never to be loved. You must hate me so. you give me what I ache for, then laughing at me from the heavens you snatch it away so abruptly. my god is a cruel god, But I submit to your punishment. This is my penance. My sin's are too great to overcome in one life time, so I'll die lonely and of a broken heart. I'll be reborn just to suffer more. I won't change a thing. This is who you made me, this is who I am. The more I suffer your will, the more I love. I'll be ready when you recede this punishment. when I receive heavens love, I'll be with her.
Monday, November 9, 2009
WTF is this?
It's been an extremely long time since I heard the words "I love you" "Baby I'm thinking of you" and "I place no one above you/I can't remember the last time those words were said/I wanna hear them so bad that it's messing with my head/I'm doing everything right, but this situation feels wrong/I'm asking myself "why are those words taking so long"?/I'm everything you could want in a man and more/so WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU WAITING FOR?/I won't wait forever just to hear you speak/this is depressing/time is running out/our future look's bleak/if this is not about love, then what am i here for?/this is taxing/i'm soo tired/this is becoming a real choir/If you don't love me by now, Then i'm asking that you leave me/Because I need more then what i've been getting, believe me/my mind tells me to leave, But the heart tells me to stay/I'm a confused individual because you made me this way/You have a power over me, I guess you like it this way/By waiting to hear those words, I have become your slave/I want to hear you say "I love you" so I try a little harder/I believe you will say it, but i suffer/Now I realize i'm a martyr/It's like I'm coming off the bench, when I should be a starter/when I should be your star/My dear, Love will take you far/ What is it that your scared of?/I don't even know what we are/I feel like my time is being wasted, And now time is running out/I got questions that need answers, like "what is this all about"?/I don't know how you feel, because you will never tell me/I feel like you don't love me so why won't you just exhale me?/let me go, turn me loose, use the mast and just set sail me/I 'll keep searching for love because true love will never fail me.
Friday, November 6, 2009
the glorious oratory of eugene woody
My glorious oratory is more like a horror story/I implore you to listen with your heart, not ear's/My glorious oratory will move you to tears/I have removed the fears that confined me for years/I stand upon the stage engaged with the crowd/making love to your ears with a sinister smile/every verb, every noun becomes so profound when I say what I write my oratory astounds/it would behoove you to listen, because it is my mission to verbally paint my colorful vision/been on a road to perdition but my oratory saved me from the horror story/now my story is a glorious one/from the dark I have risen like the glorious sun/now I sing it from the rafters like i'm Gloria's son/I preyed to god for this day, now the glory is done/it's just me upon the stage, me and the crowd are one/I close my eye's, grab the mic and speak to god and i'm i'm cured, of the evils in my life that I have violently endured/My oratory's glorious and thats what i'm into/But my oratory is only glorious because of what I been through.
Wednesday, November 4, 2009
michelle (Mrs. obama)
Tuesday, November 3, 2009
they not gonna like you
They not gonna like you/I know, but see if I care/I'm trying to win the award for asshole of the year/See Nice don't cut it in this world filled with hate/See Nice finished last in the race for first place/If you ever crossed me, Then my wrath you shall feel/because now i got a heart that's black encased in steel/it's a liberating thing to live with no fear/so I could give the f*ck if you don't like it my dear/They not gonna like you, I know/But thats none of my concern/I deserve these feeling/ this contempt I earned/These feeling aren't innate, these feelings are learned/I'm just your offspring, so how could I be spurned?/You made me this way, so don't complain now/Now I turned on you, I'm Your bastard child/I'm just strong enough now to say these things out loud/I'm not the same person, and of that i'm proud/They not gonna like you/Why?/ because they can't take advantage?/Because I rebuilt a heart that was mangled and damaged?/My will, My resolve, and my faith, they were challenged/Been tested all my life to the point that I'm famished/But now it's feast or famine and the world is my salmon/and i'm still hungry, in you kitchen i'm standing/My respect i'm demanding/so you can keep your like/i'm not worried about the people that don't like my new life.
Monday, November 2, 2009
I ain't thinking bout you
I did not write this about anyone, I repeat I did not write this about anyone. this was written as a song to a popular beat while a popular rapper was in the booth doing what he does (no names). I'm a poet, not a rapper. If I was a rapper I would be your favorite. enjoy!
I ain't thinking about you/ look, wanna know why?/true be told you almost brought a tear to my eye/brought me to my knee's, asking the lord why?/What is it that I did?/why did this have to die?/Answering my own questions, like I ain't do sh*t/I handled my business, I didn't deserve this/I ain't thinking about you/cause you don't deserve it/your ass should be happy that I even wrote this/But let me calm down, I don't wanna sound pissed/But let me state facts, you will not be missed/I ain't thinking about you/But you should think about this, I held your ass down and the economy ain't sh*t/And i'da hit the streets chopping dimes off a brick, just to make sure my baby girl had it/stayed faithful to you, I wasn't thinking about them chicks/I could of did you dirty, they were all on my dick/I displayed patients, while you displayed fit's/your just a little brat, I'm on some grown man sh*t/you small time pussy, I got a grown man dick/so f*ck this situation, I'm shooting out of it/you Cleveland out this hoe, I'm lebron james chick/I'm leaving this small town and coming to the knicks/ FREE AGENT!!!
Why are you thinking bout me? made a mistake I guess?/just think about your self, Because thats what you do best/you were a tuff question, I studied for the test/and even though I failed, the lesson I kept/I stumbled out the blocks, but I gathered my steps/ I'm gonna win the race in this life I bet/I'm thinking about me now, quiet as kept/A selfish individual, thats what you get/Don't call me, because I won't pick up/If you got hit by a car, I wouldn't give a f*ck/you wasted my time, thats just my luck/but my clocks still ticking and I won't give up/Don't call me, just stay in you place/I'm a handsome man, have you looked at my face?/that's part of the reason why you were easily replaced/I got another though bread, thick ass, small waist/I pat myself on the back to complement my taste.........IT"S OVER. now go and think about that. thanks for the motivation, it's done, thats a wrap. HE'S FOCUSED!!!
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
the balled of the maestro
He played a different kind of melody/A tune so melodic/He conducted such an orchestra with millions of instruments/the percussionist amazed while the violinist played, the string instruments were being strummed away/vividly he saw the melody that he would bring to life/He conducted with such passion, because It represented his life/two kids and a wife that were removed from his life, courtesy of a drunk driver on that fateful night/He stood in front of the crowd with his back turned to them, and got in tune with the orchestra that represented him/He held the baton tight that he would use this night, that he would swing rhythmically when the time was right/The orchestra tuned their instruments and he made sure he was ready/raised his arms stern and steady/ He had the world on the ready/At that moment he would strike, they cut on the house light, and the police rushed the stage with news that would enslave the melodies that would rage from the baton that he waved on stage/He didn't cry or flinch, He was dazed/The orchestra would never play/No one ever got to hear what was ringing in his ear/ The maestro disappeared/The melodies still play in his head, But less melodic/He conducts an orchestra of just one/He stood in front of the grave of his family/the baton in one hand, and a loaded gun hung from the other/He raised the gun to his head, and silenced the melodies, and only god heard the balled of the maestro, damn.
Tuesday, October 27, 2009
I'm not your enemy
I don't know how I became your enemy. Don't even know if I care. All your doing is pushing me away, When all I want to do is be there. I understand life is hard and your going through it. God know's it's not easy for me. I never once took it out on you, But yet you seem to take it out on me. See you don't realize just how you sound, When you say the things you say to me. I tried my best to understand you, Don't know if you could understand me. You told me things I never knew before, So I try to gain understanding. All I asked for was your time to talk, And all of a sudden I'm demanding. Then you tell me It's not about me, So my issues I huddle over. But now I see just what it really is, that horrible chip upon your shoulder. I don't know how I became your enemy. Don't even know if I care. All you did was push me away, When I tried to be there. Guess thats the way life is sometimes. The more you try, the more they fight. When I look back at the situation, I know I tried with all my might. I'm not your enemy, remember this. My dear the world only gets colder. I hope one day you realize, I only offered a warm coat and a shoulder.
Monday, October 26, 2009
By the time you read this.
By the time you read this I'll be gone. I was too scared to tell you I was leaving. I wrote this as you slept, in the bed we once kept, I was too scared to tell you that I'm greaving. I seen my death in a dream, my life slipping away, but i'm too scared to tell you your the reason. Theres so many things I want to say, I want to express the truth, But I'm scared because I know you won't believe them. God givith and he taketh away, I can't have you, so for now i'm just a god forsaking heathen. By the time you read this i'll be gone, the man you once knew will change like the seasons.A romance birthed in the spring that would end in the fall, I hope this fall give's my life a new meaning. By the time you read this, I'll be gone. My love ends and my life begins anew. I saw my death in my sleep. My life drifting away, But the reason will not be because of you. Goodbye my love.
Saturday, October 24, 2009
paranoid/fear
The troubles of the past, got me questioning my future. the troubles of my past, are getting harder to get past. it's troublesome that I trust no one. I don't even trust myself. I second guess all my decisions, and questions your motives. I know I shouldnt be this way, But my past was real hard on me. Been used, abused and cheated on before. And lied to constantly. so now I constantly question everything that don't feel right to me. I guess I fear being happy, because happy is something I never been. I never been told the truth before, so I guess i'm comfortable with lies. I should be comfortable looking in your eyes, knowing that your not the same as them. I guess I fear losing the fear of having it done to me again. Look this is me being vurnarable. You have the power to destroy me. I'm fearful for my life right now, because i'm letting love control me. The hardest thing for us to do is change, And i'm giving it my very best. I just prey my reality is truthful now, Because i'm tried of everything being second guessed. Love got me living in fear. I just don't want to be hurt again.
Friday, October 23, 2009
Ialone
Ialone. I used to walk with such feeling. now my emotions are reeling. now I walk with no direction. got me suffering from depression. look I was walking with a plan. she was walking as my girl, I was walking as her man. now this is the walk I can't stand, because now i'm walking alone a cingular man. holding the hand of solitary. confined to just I now. selfish i think I ought to be, because I spent to much time, worring about we. you never worried about me. she spent all of her time worrying about she. guess thats the way it ought to be. In your head their was just you, in my heart there was a we. Ialone. now all i'm left with is me.so back to the pod I go to Itouch thee, playlist she left for my soul. the soundtrak of my life. A reoccurring theme. The foot prints in the sand that I seen in my dream. Before I saw two prints. now all i see is one. I'm crossing over this bridge now, the damage is done. This is how it has to be, to be the man I wanna. And once I find what i'm looking for, come back for you i'm gonna. Thats why I didn't burn this bridge here, because I'm hoping you will cross it. I'm on the other side waiting on you. My dear don't take to long to follow.
Wednesday, October 14, 2009
don't live in your head again
Don't live in your head again/you'll lose touch with reality/your fantasy's will trick you and can't tell the disparity's/on paranoia's voyage, as you travel to the doubt in me/the lines are blurred, its upside down and turned/now whats reality?/don't live in your head again/you' start to think the worst of things/the answers that you got, you question those and now your hurting things/the truth becomes a lie because emotion clouds your reasoning/the gumbo tasted great and now your adding too much seasoning/don't live in your head again, it's full of false illusion's/your selfish, so doomed to come to selfish ass conclusions/you'll think whats right is wrong because whats right is not appealing/the truth it hurts, it's sobering, it also hurt your feelings/your sensitivity done sent you sailing to the ceiling/you think about it too much/stuck trying to reveal things/don't live in your head again you know when something isn't right/you decisively decide with action that your gonna strike/so with that said within my head, withdraw into my present day/you know just what it is, now make your mind up and be on your way. thanks for the motivation.
Tuesday, October 13, 2009
I want my shirt back
I want my shrit back. It may seem small and juvenile but I love that shirt. The feelings I had for you my dear, passed. The feelings I have for that shirt will last. That shirt held me when I was sick, and nursed me back to health. That shirt had my back like nobody else. We were a team, my shirt fit me to a tee. To lose that shirt hurts me more then losing thee. so please be a woman about the situation please. Return the best friend I ever had back to me. You saw an opportunity to take my shirt, and you grabbed it. So that makes you a thief because I never said you could have it. Just think, your with somebody new so why would you wear it? That shirt has stories behind it, do you want to share it? Do you want to tell him where you got it from? And why you still wear it? there will never be a you and me so just grin and bear it. My shirt never liked you so please don't wear it. Why hold on to the past? Enjoy his presence. My birthday's coming up so send it as a present. This may be small to you, but it's large amongst things. The reunion of us both. The unshakable team. I love that shirt more then anyone or anything. Be a woman about this and fruition my dream. thanks for the motivation.
Monday, October 12, 2009
my moon night
Tuesday, September 29, 2009
poppa's feet
Poppa's pain is evident, It shows in his feet. poppa carried us as far as he could. He carried us. Me on his back, and momma in his arms. For thousands of miles he walked and walked. We never really had a home because momma was sick and poppa had to find work where he could. odd jobs he would find just to soothe momma's pain, as she was dying from the cancer within. when poppa would work, he would scrap up the money that he could just to shelter us in a low rent hotel. momma cried and cried because she could not help poppa with the struggle, she would often cry herself to sleep. I weep for momma. Momma couldn't even find peace in her sleep. she tossed and turned as the cancer ripped her insides apart. momma's pain was evident, It showed in her sleep. before poppa would leave he stood over momma's bed, cried, then kissed mama's feet. He left a pint of brandy for mama when the pain was to much, as she often spit up blood from her sleep. I was strong for poppa, I didn't cry and I watched over momma like a man. I knew I made poppa proud. Poppa's pain was evident, It showed in his feet. He walked with the hurt in his face. The limps in his steps. But poppa carried us as far as he could. Me on his back and momma in his arms, where she died from the cancer within. He carried me on his back as he cried as soft as he could. I held poppa as tight as I could. Poppas feet gave out, and he could no longer carry me and momma anymore. Poppa did as much as he could. In the middle of the street poppa wept, because momma died in his arms. Now he was dying of a broken heart. He laid momma on the cardboard box that was to be our bed, and kissed her lifeless feet. poppa laid next to momma and I laid next to momma. The city lights watched us sleep that night. Momma finally found peace from the cancer within and poppa died in his sleep of a broken heart. My pain Is evident, It shows in my eye's. I carry momma and poppa with me as I go. I walk like poppa as I carry them both, Deep within my homeless soul.
Tuesday, September 22, 2009
A life devoid of love
A life devoid of love is no life at all. pillows soaked in tears from the thought of a emotion that I'm not to receive. Devoid of love so I don't believe. Never shown what I diligently searched for. years of empty existence. stuck with a heart that cries for more and receives much less. left to question my worth. shown that I am worthless. A heart devoid of love but has refused to blacken. pure it remains in it's most rawest state. A heart devoid of love still in its infant state. A life devoid of love, so in purgatory I await. Awaiting the harbinger of the emotion I long for. A head humbly bowed. Hands placed together and raised to the heavens. knees acquainted with the soil, I prey. Please find me love, You are my reason to live. Life without you is no life at all. please find me. I am searching for you but I am tired. I will rest here, shining my light to guide you. waiting to drink of your heavenly nectar. I wish to saturate my body with your essence. Such A thirst I have built that you can only quench. I wait in this purgatory. Shining my light. hoping you find me in time. My life devoid of love has not been a life at all. Please enter my life so it can be just that, A life of love. I want to live. Thanks for the motivation.
Monday, September 21, 2009
the red dot saga, part one
I lay motionless in a room with no light. I lay motionless but my mind is racing. I lay motionless in a room with no light. I lay motionless but my eye's are serching. in this room the dark rules and swallows the light whole, and its too dark to know if my eye's are moving. I can feel myself blinking, but there is no difference between eye's open or shut. my eye's continue to serch the dark, they have begun to ajust to the black void. deprived of any kind of light or color, my eye's happily consume the black nothingness of the room. the red dot suddenly appeared, it sent my eye's into a bit of confusion. I noticed the red dot instanly because there was nothing else to compare it to. the red dot ley dead center in a room of full of black, boldly standing out, proud to be different. I kept my eye's fixed on this red dot, as I did not know its origin. I focused on this red dot so intensely that I never thought to question if it even existed. I would later find that it did. the red dot began to move. slow and deliberate, like it had a purpose. it did not move around the room, but rather in a select spot. it moved in a pattern. over and over it traced it's own foot prints. I followed as best I could. I realized the red dot was trying to spell something, but what? I focused even more on the pattern the red dot was making. I struggled but I was able to make out the letters. as the red dot started it's pattern from the beginning, I sounded the letters out. G,O,T,T,C,H,A. huh? what was this red dot trying to tell me? My over analytical nature took hold. I had nothing but questions, but no one to ask. Stuck in my own mind I didn't realize the red dot disappeared. As baffling as it's appearance was, It's dissapearance left me perplexed. I sat up in my bed wondering if my head was screwed on properly. I searched for my glasses in this dark room. I stumbled upon them on my window seal. I rose to my feet and opened my window curtains, exposing the window shade. I opened the shade and exposed the window I would open. the cold, dry night air alerted me from the sleepy stupor I was in. I sat on the edge of my bed, overlooking the streets and actions of the creatures of the night. Lost in my own mind again. recapping the prior event. I was startled by the ring of my cell phone. My clumsy fumbling made me drop the phone to the floor below. Luckily the cell phone light was still on which made it's retrieval simple. I searched my phone for the missed call I received. A number that I did not know inhabited my phone. at first I was reluctant to call it back, But my curiosity overruled my previous feeling. As I pressed the call button I kept wondering who this could be. The phone began to ring. the unknown made me nervous. Hello! I struck quickly. I received no answer. But I could tell someone was on the other line. Hello! I repeated, still nothing. My frustration was growing and as I readied myself to hang up, the red dot appeared again. It took it's post on my chest. I frantically searched the area out my window to find where this red dot came from. I found nothing. I could hear laughing coming from my phone. I placed it back to my face and forcefully asked "who is this". "hello woody!" is what I was met with. the voice was so familiar, But I couldn't place it. "why don't you love me?" she said. "dahlia?" I replied. "gotcha" was the last thing I ever heard. That red dot was the last thing I ever saw. damn, GOTCHA. to be continued
Tuesday, September 15, 2009
dig deeper eugene woody
Standing in front of the grave where the past was buried/ Armed with a spade and a pickaxe/ I drop to one knee and grab a handful of earth. my fingers begin to grind the cold clump of soil/my eyes fixed on the tombstone directly in front of me. it read "a buried past of sorrow and pain, birthed a future of fearless living"/I swore I would not be back here, unearthing painful memories/but I left something important in this tomb/the lessons I learned from the life I lived are too important to be buried and forgotten/the wisdom accumulated was buried as well, and to leave it would make the past prologue/there will be no regression, because my future depends on progress/the cold air has chilled the the earth, hardening it's surface/I grab the pickaxe and trow it over my shoulder/my mind begins to lock in to the task at hand/I am aware that I will be forced to relive it all, but I need to remember what made me/my grip tightens on the pickaxe and my muscles tense and flex in the cold autumn air/I raise my head to the cloud filled sky, where the moon has a front row seat/I close my eye's and relax my body/ a phrase begins to play in my mind, "dig deep eugene woody, dig deep"/I break from my trance like state and remember that I hold the pickaxe/It has become an extension of me/I rise the pickaxe high in the cold autumn air, the moons light holds on to my goose bumps/I strike the earth with brute force and primal aggression/the pickaxe rips through the soil like a hot knife through butter/dig deep eugene woody, dig deep/I continue to strike the earth as hard as I can, each strike more brute then the last/the moon seems amused in my action/ it seems to draw itself closer to me with each strike I apply to this sacred soil/I pause to wipe my brow of sweat and switch to the spade/I shot a glance at the moon and smiled at its presence/dig deep Eugene woody, dig deep/the spade lifts the loosened earth out of the disturb plot/my excavation of memories buried reaches a fever pitch/digging with passion, digging with a purpose, dig deep Eugene woody, dig deep/the sweat pours from my brow now and I am drenched in it/I refuse to relax my grip on the spade and a direct result of this is my hands becoming raw/this is taxing, but dig deeper/the spade rips through earth until it bangs against a metal casket, the resting place of pain/I toss the spade to the side and I lift the upper potion of the casket/the memories rush into my body as if they missed tormenting me/they try to dig deep into my soul but are met with a new resistance/pain can barely penetrate my surface/I rise my head to the moon that watched me all night, dig deep in the cold autumn air/I remember the lessons burned into my skin from the fire of past infernos/I can never forget the lessons I learned/but most importantly I can never forget to dig deeper Eugene woody, dig deeper. thanks for the motivation.
Wednesday, September 9, 2009
family feud
I guess were not as close as I thought we were. out of 7 I only talk to 1. I guess were not as close as I thought we were. this family feud we entered into is stupid. I guess this is the faith for this family. outsiders may look and think we are very disfunctional. But the dysfunction of not speaking seem to help us function better then being around each other fighting like animals. I do love you from afar, but in close proximity, I seem to want to hurt you the most. I use words that cut deep because I am your blood, and I feel what will send you in frenzy. I do it to expose what should not be, I wonder why you do it? we are not normal. I can not talk to you like a normal person, because you will not hear with normal ears. dysfunction jams your ears, so you only respond to screaming. the aftermath only exposes the fact that nothing has changed a bit. you are who you are. I shall never seek to change that again. the truth is we are family, my flesh and blood, but you have now become ashes in the wind. that means the body of this family died a long time ago and was cremated. the ashes were scatted about, and the soul never returned.. I knew we weren't as close as I thought we were, but I was hopeful I could change that. such a naive boy. who am I to try to keep a family together? I am no saint. I am no savior. but I am a brother that cares. but I'm not infantile. this family is like a boat with no anchor, drifting with no direction. maybe I could blame it on the captain, I can't because the captain jumped ship along time ago. no wonder this boat has no direction. well ready the sails crew, and man the cannons. we can do this without our lame duck captain. the crew jumped ship as well. damn. I guess we don't have to be as close as I thought we were. and remember I do love you from afar. the truth is we are family, my flesh and blood, but you have now become ashes in the wind. because of this family feud, there will be no family reunions. so I guess I'll see you all at a funeral. WHAT A DAMN SHAME. this is a terrible motivation.
Tuesday, September 8, 2009
on the road to forever
we travel this road together/side by side/your hand in mine/the road is filled with unknown dangers that wait to obstruct our path/I look over to you and I can see the worry on your face/your palm has become clammy and your mood uneasy/I hold your hand tighter and I look over to you/I want you to see the confidence in my eyes/"we are bigger then this road" I say to you, "as long as we walk together we have nothing to worry over"/this road should worry about us/this road should worry about me/if so much as a single tear drops from her eye's then you will know worry/ you will know fear/you will know my wrath/this road will be nothing more then an after thought/as we are traveling to a place called forever/and to get there I will gladly die a thousand times so that she can live once/I will suffer the terror and scorn of this road so we can arrive at eternity/this road was meant to stifle us and drive our destination askew/to have you walk away from me is the goal of this demonic road/But you willingly put you hand in mine which means you want this as well/and that is the only reassurance I need/you trust and believe in my ability to lead/to lead us from frustration and doubt/I shall never falter or fail you/this road is taxing and bares down upon me with more force then I could have imagined/I stand tall as a man should/you look over to me and you can see that my pain is evident/you hold my hand tighter and whisper "well get though this together babe"/I feel no pain/we journey on this road together/side by side/your hand in mine/our destination is a place called forever/and as long as I have you to hold my hand/motivated by love/our destination we shall reach. thanks for the motivation.
Saturday, September 5, 2009
the weather change and the fall from the building
tonight is your night/so own it/this moment/will pass/it wont last/its your last time to sin in the skin that your in/the sun gave us moments of fun as we drifted away in it's rays/our will be done/the FALL has come and the weather will change/but tonight it makes no difference mayn/we survived another summer to see another FALL/we stand atop the buildings/thats a precipice ya'll/we dance and tribal chant, unafraid of the FALL/now check the parallel unafraid of the FALL/the weather will change, we could not care at all/because we are so prepare, we don't FALL in the FALL/and off this building ledge we could FALL/but we don't adhere to what gravity has prescribed to ya'll/so tonight we FALL, but it feels like we are flying/ we bend time, matter and space by denying/what we know to be true/but if we did FALL and didn't die/then the lie turned out to be the truth/all because of the FALL, the weather change and the FALL from the building........THINK ABOUT IT. thanks for the motivation.
Wednesday, September 2, 2009
teacher don't care
I sit here in retrospect/pulling the weights off myself/i realized most my teacher only taught me how to hate myself/it was hard just being a teen but to hear my teachers say "just play basketball, your life will be better that way"/I was always into the arts, as a kid I would write short story's/ I showed them to my teachers, they ignored me/nobody ever nurtured the talent that I displayed with my pen/one time I found one of my stories ripped up in a trash bin/I asked her why she ripped it up, and she simply replied, "you didn't cross your T's and dot your I's/she didn't even read the story, didn't care to I guess/if she read it she would have realized I had a lot to get off my chest/I was crying out for help but help never came/when even your teachers don't care it's a shame/but i'm not placing blame/some people just teach for a check/so from them I never expected more, never expected less/I pissed a lot of teachers off by how I would conduct myself/I acted up in class, told my teachers to go fuck them selves/I goofed off in class/ but I passed every test/ and I didn't even study much/ a blessing i guess/I was a smart kid but no one understood my plight/I was just an occupant of the dark trying to inhabit the light/so I continued to fight, and write and write and write/I wrote in the dark until my professor found me and turned on the light/He made me take advanced English and a plethora of other classes/he said "your a great writer, now get the fire under your ass kid" "I been teaching for quite a while, but until this day, I never come across a student that could write this way"/I though he was jiving me, bull sh*ting I guess/but he did something that made me second guess/one day I came to class and there was the school newspaper on my desk/he said turn to the art section, and what i saw made my heart jump out my chest/he published one of my poems I had wrote in class/I looked at him and we both just laughed/ he said I have no excuse now and on this I couldn't fight/now u have a choice cause every one knows that you can write/it only took one person to inspire me to believe in my ability/thats why i'm gonna die a poet/my pen a I are such an item b/Teacher's everywhere should realize that in children's lives they hold the biggest impact/you shape and mode there littles lives/so teach them like their future depended on it because it does/supply more then a,b,c's, chocolate milk and hugs/sometime we need you more the our parents and another school year approaches/there will be one kid that really needs your help so please FOCUS. thanks for the motivation
Tuesday, September 1, 2009
survive/alive
SURVIVE. i feel the need to constantly remind myself that i must survive this. Life has saw fit to supply the path of living with many road blocks, and i simply must push through them. SURVIVE. i feel the need to constantly remind myself to remove anyone or anything that I deem a detriment to the betterment of my future, because i must survive this I will remove them by force. SURVIVE. I am constantly reminded of the fact that I will sacrifice everything I have, every i am to survive this. I offer my blood, sweat and tears as a tribute to the gods. SURVIVE. Behind every corner is some sinister power lurking in the shadow's, laying in wait for me. I can never rest because of this. I am always at the ready to deal with whatever shall come my way. SURVIVE. this word beats in my head like thumping 808's, pounding my brains grey matter with it's solid montra. It has become a tribal chant. as i dance around this raging bon fire, I hold the words tight as I yell them as loud as I can at the full moon in the distance, I want the universe to know I will be here in the end. SURVIVE. I have seen many battles in my life time. My scares are evident but I refuse to hide them. to me they are permanent trophies etched into the skin of this proud warrior. They are also a warning to the fiends that entertain the thought of a battle, that you shall be met with war and mercy will not be given. SURVIVE. heed my call. I send this message out to all that carry ill will. I will fight until blood drips from my finger tips for the day that I am more then a surviver. I fight for the day I become, ALIVE. thanks for the motivation.
Monday, August 31, 2009
lie vs truth
please tell me another story/tell me a fairy tail that ends in a dream scenario/whisper a lulaby of lies to pacifiy my disbelief/i'm possesed by the illuion of truth/I know it to be a lie, but a lie i rather live because it's not like I've been the the greatest advocate of truthfulness/you see the deceit in me as well/some of the things we coveit most in this world were based on lies/but the diligent found the truth on their own/and the truth destroys worlds that were built on a foundation of lie's, so when you think about it ignorance truly is bliss/But i rather know then not, and I can decide for myself if the illuion is better then the reality/if I accept the illuion then I spend my days selling myself the lie's/so in essence i'm more of a liar then you are/if I accept the reality of truth then lie's have no room in my world, you have no room in my world/I know what is a lie and I know what to be true/I don't know if I can live in the lie's or except the harsh truth/so present a lie or truth to me and i'll make my decision from there/in that case ignorance is not bliss. thanks for the motivation
Thursday, August 27, 2009
rule the night/not tonight
I don't sleep like you do. in fact I don't sleep at all. My eye's must like to rebel into darkness. I seem to be more comfortable at night. nocturnal is my approach as I press the city's night life. my eye's rejoice in the city light's. overwhelmed they become as they process the artificial. My eye's and my eyelids fight for power because my eye's refuse to be covered. One moment will not be missed. I see the world for what it is at night. I see the conservative become the liberal in the blink of an eye.the dark side of your nature takes hold.....Yeah I rule the night on most occasions. Not tonight. NOPE. Tonight my eye's tell me a different story. They tell me how they would like for me to shut the hell up and let my eye lids win. My eyes have been in focus since yesterday afternoon. I put them through so much.they've seen so much. I have done everything that the day would permit. now they crave sleep. I'm sorry guys. I don't mean to be mean, but you can not rest. we still have so far to go. Some how I don't think they are gonna agree. yeah I usually rule the night. NOT TONIGHT. Fu*k this, I'm going to sleep lol. thanks for the motivation.
Wednesday, August 26, 2009
tonight we make love
I look at you intensly, but with a gentle intent/tonight we make love until both our bodies are spent/the light from the candles give this room a certain glow/the fire makes its presants known, as it dances atop the candle wick's/the hot wax melt's onto the rose pettles placed around this space/creating the perfect aroma/you stand in the doorway waiting to be greeted by me/I walk torwards you with an energetic patience/"welcome home my queen, I have awaited your arrival"/"It's wonderful to be home my king, I have missed you so"/I sweep you off your feet and cradle you in my arm's as I carry you torwards the bed/as I hold you I can tell that you feel safe in my arm's/I can tell that you want this moment as much as I do/I place you every so gently apon our satin sheets/I take a step back just to look at you/damn I'm in awe of you/theres nothing in this world that rivals your beauty/theres no place I'd rather be then here with you/this is more then just love making, this is love/the antisipation grows in us both/you gesture for me to come to you/I do not hesitate/our lips are on a collision course/the closer we get the more the energy grows/I tease you and pull away/you look at me with frustration and grab the back of my neck, pulling me towards you/our lips finally meet/upon contact I can feel this uncontrolable energy coursing throughout my entire body/every single cell and mitochondria is affected/I never felt more alive/the passion brings me closer to you, and you to me/I begin to kiss your neck/you react by busying your hands on my streamline back/I kiss your spots to make you lose your inhibitions, your moans become more intense/I will not rest until I have explored every inch of you with my lips/I can not rest until I have traced your body's outline with my tongue/ you even taste beautiful/I am focused on the task at hand, but I still find a moment to be amazed at how stunning you are bathed in candle light/Locked in this embrace I cant stop myself from breathing harder/I cant stop my heart from beating faster/I can't stop my impulse's/I have lost control/I am lost in this moment/I find my way back to you by following the sound of your voice/you whisper "take me" but it's not enough/I want you to tell me with conviction/your whisper becomes more audible "take me"/I want more, I will bring the fire out of you/I will set free your passion/I tell you that i'm not convinced that you want this/you push me away, breaking our embrace/ I am shocked, but I see why/you look back at me from this position and tell me with such force "BOY! BETTER STOP PLAYING AND TAKE ME NOW."/That is what I was looking for, I place my hands around your slender waist, with both my thumbs in the small of your back/such a site to see/I position myself to............
I found myself on the c train. the eyes of everyone on that train were fixed on me. I was sweating and my heart was pounding. I can't believe this was a dream, It felt so real. I situated my self in the seat and refocused my attention to my ipod. I was not embarrassed by the eyes of people staring at me. All I could do was smile and laugh, because I know that tonight we make love.....I cant wait to get home. thanks for the motivation.
Tuesday, August 25, 2009
free
Monday, August 24, 2009
going hard on a monday
Here we go again/going hard on a Monday/my blackberry in hand/checked my emails, I'm the man/got Starbucks in hand/of chei lattes, I'm a fan/got confidence on demand/but be clear and understand/I haven't slept in two days/working on the task at hand/they tell me that this is what it takes to make it/to bring yourself near death and survive/well I am the first person account on the news at eleven, because I'm here to tell the story my brethren/my head still hurts from all the caffeine I ingested/eyes sensitive to the light, because of going from day to night/then back into day light/i keep them open with all my might/just eight hours more, then I can rest these eyes tonight/but right now I gotta fight/like tina turner when SHE beat ike/I fighting for a reason, so a little pain is alright/so you might just be starting/but understand i haven't stopped/while you sleep/ i'm in the lab/with a beaker glass/ trying to get things to pop/i guess i want it now more then i ever did/it's crippling somedays/but i'm strong enough to make it back and go hard on yet another monday. thanks for the motivation.
